It is easier to feel like your life matters when you are doing something that the world views as important. A military post, missionary role, or mega million-dollar investor all fall into the category of important positions. People pour their lives into different titles and achievements in order to feel important, but when your life's work isn't glamorous, envied, or admired it's easy to forget your importance. I don't think the desire to feel important is wrong. I think God made us that way because He wants us to know His importance lies within us. He wants to satisfy our every desire. However, the day-to-day grind of an "average" existence can slowly wear down your definition of important. For that reason, turmoil, hardship, or even bumps along your "planned route" begin to feel like infinite blessings because they reroute your focus. You remember the importance and significance of every little moment in your day. You become aware of the truly important matters of life, and trust that your life has a greater purpose. You praise God for making you capable of reaching new heights that you would never have known prior to that mountain or valley. Trials really become precious gifts.
Instead of seeing my new routine as heavy or hard, I will choose to see the significance in my ability to care for my children, meet new faces at doctors offices, emergency rooms, and therapy clinics, and I will thank God for each new day I'm given.
It's amazing how a new lifestyle changes your outlook...
I would count our weekend as a great one! Even though we functioned on fewer sleep cycles, ended up at the ER after Levi's G-tube came out (I was proud of myself for putting it back in correctly, the doc just wanted to double check since it is so fresh), and we didn't do anything really exciting except watch a rented flick. But it really felt like a great weekend. Our routine seems a bit more manageable, and we'll eventually figure out what Levi's future looks like. All we can see now is today, so today we'll thank God for another day.