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Showing posts from May, 2018

Planned parenthood

"The best - laid plans   of mice and men often go awry" I don't think there could be a more counter intuitive idea than that of "planned parenthood." Now I'm not making any social or moral comment on the organization with the same title (although it is quite fitting). Rather, I propose that those of us who think we can live by a "plan" are sorely mistaken. Even if you do happen to be someone who went to your college of choice, married at your ideal age, obtained your ideal job, and had exactly the amount of children you desired when you wanted, does not mean that all your plans will continue to come to fruition. In fact, I think it's almost more detrimental to have so many plans succeed without hiccups, because when those gasps for air do eventually occur, they will seem life-threatening. As a natural "planner" myself, I can see the error in such methodology. I'm thankful that so many of my plans have gone awry so that I can c

Broke into Whole

Times of greatest stress and tension occur because we have entered into a temporary moment of brokenness. Brokenness because of our bruises Brokenness because of busyness Brokenness because of our blaming Brokenness because of our battles Brokenness because of our being Until we enter a time of solitude with our Savior in order to receive serene healing, we feel helpless and hopeless as we hang on brokenness. Once we slow down and separate ourselves for a short time from standard routine of this life and enter into a purposeful time of respite, only then can we be still and quiet long enough to hear God, feel His Spirit, and sweetly unite with His Son. Then all brokenness seems to wash away. We are fresh, new, whole. This big man is no longer in preschool! Except that he'll be at the same preschool for Kindergarten, so he is calling it the "5 class." I like that better anyway! :) He was dressed as a "toy builder" for "when I grow up&

Mothers keep learning

When I go anywhere without my kids these days people sweetly stare at me and ask "when is the big day?" When I tell them I have just about a month left, they smile excitedly and then question if this is my first baby. When I tell them it's my fourth, I undoubtedly see their pupils increase in size and their breath cease for a moment. While it's fun and comical to catch someone off guard, I definitely find it strange how few people find true joy in a large compact family. I get plenty of sarcasm, pity, and unmerited advice but only occasional true joy. The best comment I've ever received came last week at the end of a particularly long morning. I was opening the sliding door of our minivan trying to hustle and unbuckle little ones when I heard a yell from across the grocery store parking lot. "You're awesome mama! You are just beautiful! Stay encouraged!" At first I wasn't even sure I was suppose to be the recipient of the casual compliments beca

Seven split the sea

Matthew and I just celebrated our 7th wedding anniversary. We've now been married as long as we dated before getting married. Seven years of dating may seem a little lingered for a couple who didn't meet in high school, nor lived together prior to marriage, but for us, the growth process took a little time. Sadly we were not mature enough to recognize our need for growth, but thanks be to God, He took the reins.  After braking off our first engagement, I'd say the idea that we'd ever have a healthy/happy life together felt something like standing in front of a deep ocean with no raft while an army approaches from behind. Death on all sides: impossible solution. Thank goodness God is in the mission of the impossible. As the song goes, "He split the sea so I could walk right through it, my fears were drown in perfect love." We didn't drown, but all our fears did. Instead of going back to another dessert  or another lifestyle of slavery like the Israelites b