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Smelly Stable

A sweet man once asked me why I read the Bible over and over. Hadn't I already read it all the way through? Well... I had, but I truly gain new insight almost every time I read it. Not every time, because my heart and mind are not always in the right place to hear from God, but very often I find either passages that seem brand new, or ones I've memorized that have completely new wisdom to impart.  Now, with new children's versions floating around my home, I'm actually seeing familiar stories with fresh eyes. Take the Christmas story for instance. Silas has a picture version of the nativity scene that seems a bit more involved than I remembered. Instead of just the camel, sheep, and donkey, there are real barn animals pictured. There are rats running around the manager and piles of mud and manure, which struck me as uniquely realistic. That's when I started imagining an exhausted pregnant teenager disgusted and frustrated with the environment of her first labor and

To ski or not to ski

Why do people ski? It's very expensive, the preparation, clothing, and equipment are kind of ridiculous, there is a good chance you could get seriously injured, and it's physically exhausting. I've only been skiing three times in my life, but I LOVED it each time, and I hope I get the chance to go again one day. Well I think skiing is very similar to parenting little ones... with one major difference of course. When you look at our lack of sleep from our babies, who can drive us mad at tired moments, with the illnesses that make life that much more difficult, alongside Silas' new deceit and intelligence (he'll throw out a potty request or "what is that over there mommy" when we are trying to reprimand him). Couple this with physical exhaustion, diminishing finances, additional yucky chores, and Levi's physical disabilities, and you'd probably think we were done having children. You'd be absolutely wrong. The major difference between skiing a

Happy Spitter

I recently grabbed coffee with a sweet girl that I watched grow through high school. I was privy to her accepting Christ, taking her first mission trip, watching her parents fight over her and her siblings custody, as well as seeing her enter her first serious relationship on her way to college. When we met the other day, she was still the same sweet, sensitive heart, but she had lost everything about her identity. Not only has her life spiraled into chaos and confusion, but she believes in nothing and everything. At times careless, at times homeless, and at times lifeless, she graciously opened her heart to me once again as she seemed desperate to expunge some of her deepest shame. With all the love I had, I sought to understand and comfort without agenda or judgement. One thing truly struck me though. She explained that after many years of over-analyzing, over-stressing and over-thinking her decisions to the point of migraines, she now believes that following one's feelings

Do as I do

Parents often think they can get away with murder and if accidentally caught in the metaphorical outhouse by one of their curious children, just echo the tried (but not true), "Do as I say, not as I do." What many of us don't realize (or simply try not to acknowledge) is that this saying is almost nearly impossible for kids to follow. Think about it, the things we saw our parents do, even if taught otherwise, are the very subconscious things we find ourselves repeating. From infancy, children are under estimated, and their cognitive abilities to decipher fraud is remarkable. I recently experienced the power of actions with our oldest son. I have told him for a long time (because I feel like if I start early and repeat it, it will miraculously happen..... ha ha) that we should give away some of his toys at Christmas time since he always receives new ones. He insisted that he loves every single one of his toys, and he'd rather keep the old ones than get anything new.

Thanksgiving together

I'm not one to be described as quiet. In fact when a developmental psychologist told us last July to make sure we talk a lot around Levi so that his language develops properly after being in a quiet NICU for four months, I told her that that would absolutely not be a concern in our home. Even Silas can be found talking to himself on a daily basis. So when this season of "quiet" staycation approached during the holidays, I wondered if I'd feel isolated or lonely. The exact opposite has occurred. We are certainly social people, but being "forced" to change up our daily life and sit still with each other under one roof has been amazing. Matthew agreed that everyone should take such a time of hiatus every so often just to evaluate what we are doing and why we are doing it. For the first time in my life, we had only three people at our Thanksgiving feast (four if you count the few minutes Levi was awake). While it would seem sad to some, it was beautiful becau

Want to die?

If I told you that I was jealous of my friend Kyra who died three months ago would you think I was depressed? If you don't know Jesus, you probably would. It's true. I'm jealous of her, sometimes more than others, but many times it feels like she received an invitation to the unbelievable feast, and I'm still slowly nibbling saltines. The party started, but I didn't get invited. Don't misunderstand... I LOVE my life, but after Kyra died, I realized even more what the Bible means when it speaks of our "true home." Instead of wanting to do certain things "before I die," I will be ready and excited when God calls me to Heaven regardless of what I've accomplished. Not because I long to see Kyra, but because I long to see God. While I think I'd miss my family and friends here, I know I won't miss them when I'm in heaven singing praises to my creator.  Loving this life more than Heaven just means we haven't quite grasped our p

Welcome to the walls Levi

Most people snap those precious, first baby photos between birth and two months of age. Well, our little Levi will finally get some wall time here at the Smith house now that we relished in a short, but very sweet, photo shoot thanks to our friend Morgan ( www.photographymhc.com ). And thanks to my sweet friend Dana, I am hopeful that Levi will one day take a picture likes these sweet preemies too: Little Things Little Levi is doing well too... - After a month with his leg braces on, we will see his orthopaedic doctor on Monday to check the progress. Hopefully we only have two months left of all day  brace wear! - After a GI visit this week, it looks like much of our future progress is at our discretion, and with feeding specialists' guidance, Levi tried his first taste of what I affectionately call banana milk soup today! He's had a few drops of milk by mouth before but nothing else, so this was HUGE! While he gagged somewhere