Silas is 2!

I am so very proud of all my boys right now. I feel like we've hit a little stride in this marathon. Silas is two today! He's rocking it in the big-boy underwear with only a handful of accidents. Little Levi is also rocking it on the cPap bubble gum (off the training wheels but still has mommy and daddy holding the back of the bike if we are sticking with this analogy). And my amazing husband is leading our family decisions, carrying those extra loads at our house, and handling details with regard to real-life logistics all so that I can breathe a little extra air. I just thank God daily for creating Matthew. He also held Levi for the first time! (Had to rip off the band aid and trust he wouldn't break him.) He said he finally felt like a daddy of two and not just some weird hospital pregnancy on my part.

One of the things I hate most in the world is stressing, worrying, and even thinking frequently about temporal, surface-level, materialistic, (albeit normal) worldly stuff. And our current reality has forced all those thoughts to dissipate. It is a blessing I want to maintain even after this situation, God-willing, subsides. I don't want to return to my "normal" way of thinking. I am truly grateful and honored to be experiencing this hardship, if for no other reason than to weed out such useless and wasted energy.

I pray that Levi can come home and experience all the normal infant experiences, including providing me with sleepless nights because he's extra hungry. However, I pray that my response is abnormal in that I am grateful for his life and his ability to communicate with strong, wailing lungs. I know this is a lofty goal, and I know I can give myself grace to respond however I'd like, but I truly feel different, and I want to strive to never forget the peace in living moment-by-moment.

Thank you for that Levi, and thank you Lord!

Happy Happy Birthday to my first born son who changed our world for the better too! God allowed us to have the same nurse in the NICU this week that we had with Silas, we remembered her so much because of how amazing she is!  She's loved and cared for both our boys now!!! Amazing!
Love you Silas Cary Smith!

Prayer requests for Levi below...

Please pray for Levi to gain some more weight! While he's a pound heavier than he was at birth, the doctors want him to gain weight faster so other things can progress too.

Please also pray for his upcoming, repeat brain scan today, which they are just doing continuing to follow like his eyes for premature imaging reasons.

Thank you SO much for all your prayers!

~Birthday Buster