Coffee CubBuster

Sometimes in the next week, we will meet a new member of our family! While I can hardly believe the pregnancy has come to the end, like everything, it's definitely been a process. There's a process to making life form, just like there is a process to developing character. While every parent knows that lessons must be taught more than once, I think we forget the process of character development really can take a lifetime. I didn't fall in love with Jesus over night. It was a process. My husband and I didn't have a healthy marriage over night, it has been a process. Similarly, I cannot concern myself when my children show growth and appreciation one minute, and detrimental integrity flaws the next. They are going to have a long process of maturation. How can we expect them to get it right every time? Wasn't it the really ugly stuff in me that took the longest to rectify? Even grown adults don't change completely when they come to know the Lord. They may have some...

"Mommy, watch this!" "Mommy, mommy, see." "Mommy, watch what I can do!" "Mommy, dis!" Like most young children, my boys are constantly seeking affirmation, approval, and acknowledgement. I can't even compliment or encourage one child without the other desiring to show me they can do the exact same thing or something better in their eyes. There's a natural (and probably a partial parent-influenced) competition that exists between my boys despite their varying abilities. While I think some sibling rivalry is inevitable, I have to watch and encourage their individuality and remind (my eldest) that not everything is in fact a competition. More importantly in a day where every child seems to get a trophy and many parents fear low self-esteem or self-consciousness in their kids, I think it's important to teach children HOW TO LOSE. Learning to celebrate others' victories even when it highlights our loss builds a character that many y...

Have you ever tried to start a new exercise regimen in order to get healthier? Or maybe get out of bed an hour or two early to be more productive or disciplined. The first two or three times is pretty rough. Yet a good friend wouldn't discourage healthy habits. Instead he/she would encourage you to stick with it, because you actually feel better after you get adjusted to the lifestyle change. Then when you eat better, sleep better, and spend your time better, you feel better as a whole, and most of the time you'll enjoy working out or reading in the wee hours when the sun rises. Unfortunately when it comes to kids, I don't feel like this translates. Too often I see or hear the comments after I sigh from physical, parental exhaustion. Well she did this to herself. She chose to have that many kids that quickly. She shouldn't have anymore if she's already tired. I think some people don't realize that the more kids you have, the less selfish, les...

"The best - laid plans   of mice and men often go awry" I don't think there could be a more counter intuitive idea than that of "planned parenthood." Now I'm not making any social or moral comment on the organization with the same title (although it is quite fitting). Rather, I propose that those of us who think we can live by a "plan" are sorely mistaken. Even if you do happen to be someone who went to your college of choice, married at your ideal age, obtained your ideal job, and had exactly the amount of children you desired when you wanted, does not mean that all your plans will continue to come to fruition. In fact, I think it's almost more detrimental to have so many plans succeed without hiccups, because when those gasps for air do eventually occur, they will seem life-threatening. As a natural "planner" myself, I can see the error in such methodology. I'm thankful that so many of my plans have gone awry so that I can c...

Times of greatest stress and tension occur because we have entered into a temporary moment of brokenness. Brokenness because of our bruises Brokenness because of busyness Brokenness because of our blaming Brokenness because of our battles Brokenness because of our being Until we enter a time of solitude with our Savior in order to receive serene healing, we feel helpless and hopeless as we hang on brokenness. Once we slow down and separate ourselves for a short time from standard routine of this life and enter into a purposeful time of respite, only then can we be still and quiet long enough to hear God, feel His Spirit, and sweetly unite with His Son. Then all brokenness seems to wash away. We are fresh, new, whole. This big man is no longer in preschool! Except that he'll be at the same preschool for Kindergarten, so he is calling it the "5 class." I like that better anyway! :) He was dressed as a "toy builder" for "when I grow up...

When I go anywhere without my kids these days people sweetly stare at me and ask "when is the big day?" When I tell them I have just about a month left, they smile excitedly and then question if this is my first baby. When I tell them it's my fourth, I undoubtedly see their pupils increase in size and their breath cease for a moment. While it's fun and comical to catch someone off guard, I definitely find it strange how few people find true joy in a large compact family. I get plenty of sarcasm, pity, and unmerited advice but only occasional true joy. The best comment I've ever received came last week at the end of a particularly long morning. I was opening the sliding door of our minivan trying to hustle and unbuckle little ones when I heard a yell from across the grocery store parking lot. "You're awesome mama! You are just beautiful! Stay encouraged!" At first I wasn't even sure I was suppose to be the recipient of the casual compliments beca...