In offering two young women assistance with their resumes the other day, I found myself perusing my own past cover letters and curriculum vitae. It has only been three years since I was teaching literacy in all its forms, yet it also feels like a lifetime ago. I remember how much I struggled with the tension between staying home and educating little minds with basic communication and preparing older minds to deconstruct and analyze various forms of communication. Paper presents a plethora of opportunities for engagement, while diapers really only present two. Thus, my mathematical dilemma seemed to have any easy answer.
That's when I was given an opportunity that appeared potentially perfect. I accepted an English teaching position at a local college, which afforded me my days with kids and a few nights a week as Professor Smith. The shiny allure of title tempted me need for validation. Thanks be to God that circumstances beyond my control actually took over postponing my start date and all my prepared syllabi. Soon I would have little Levi and realize a new side to myself.
Looking back at my thoughts during the proposed job offer, God was already preparing my heart to change. I wrote:
I believe strongly that I am fulfilling a great purpose in my role as a wife and mother. I know that it's not the countless times I am wiping... wiping snotty noses, wiping watery eyes, wiping dirty bottoms, wiping sandy feet, wiping muddy hands. No.... it's not the wiping that I focus on. I know that I'm nurturing, teaching, building, and investing in life itself. And I truly love it. I know this is both a noble and essential responsibility even if I am becoming a minority in this profession. But it's the scary space in between that tears away at your confidence....
No.... It boils down to a sincere recognition of prayerful consideration of the gift of precious moments. In this season, and it is just that--a short season--I must seek God's perfect face to give me purpose, direction, and identity. There will be days of production, days of frustration, and days of confusion. But when I am near to my Creator, I feel completely made. Opportunities will come, changes will occur, and it is how I approach those turns in my path that will define their outcome.
Whether it is the guilt of working away from your family, the struggles of working only among your family, or somewhere in between, know that whatever you do only has value if you are doing it within the perspective of thanksgiving and grace. And if it is a day where you feel your perspective is one that will affect everyone negatively, CHOOSE to change that perspective. After all, the sunrise is new each day, why can't each day be new with it?
What I didn't realize, is that you can't always change your perspective on your own strong will or positive self-talk. It was only by the hand of God's grace that I could really change. Now, I do not have a clue if I'll ever have a title in this world again, but peace and purpose far outweigh titles, prestige, income, or the like. Let go of your need to define your identity in this world; open your hands to His perfect will, and it will be done. Incredibly, it will all come together- undone to perfectly done. Not perfect, but perfectly done.
Here's what we've done this week...
~Done Buster
That's when I was given an opportunity that appeared potentially perfect. I accepted an English teaching position at a local college, which afforded me my days with kids and a few nights a week as Professor Smith. The shiny allure of title tempted me need for validation. Thanks be to God that circumstances beyond my control actually took over postponing my start date and all my prepared syllabi. Soon I would have little Levi and realize a new side to myself.
Looking back at my thoughts during the proposed job offer, God was already preparing my heart to change. I wrote:
I believe strongly that I am fulfilling a great purpose in my role as a wife and mother. I know that it's not the countless times I am wiping... wiping snotty noses, wiping watery eyes, wiping dirty bottoms, wiping sandy feet, wiping muddy hands. No.... it's not the wiping that I focus on. I know that I'm nurturing, teaching, building, and investing in life itself. And I truly love it. I know this is both a noble and essential responsibility even if I am becoming a minority in this profession. But it's the scary space in between that tears away at your confidence....
No.... It boils down to a sincere recognition of prayerful consideration of the gift of precious moments. In this season, and it is just that--a short season--I must seek God's perfect face to give me purpose, direction, and identity. There will be days of production, days of frustration, and days of confusion. But when I am near to my Creator, I feel completely made. Opportunities will come, changes will occur, and it is how I approach those turns in my path that will define their outcome.
Whether it is the guilt of working away from your family, the struggles of working only among your family, or somewhere in between, know that whatever you do only has value if you are doing it within the perspective of thanksgiving and grace. And if it is a day where you feel your perspective is one that will affect everyone negatively, CHOOSE to change that perspective. After all, the sunrise is new each day, why can't each day be new with it?
What I didn't realize, is that you can't always change your perspective on your own strong will or positive self-talk. It was only by the hand of God's grace that I could really change. Now, I do not have a clue if I'll ever have a title in this world again, but peace and purpose far outweigh titles, prestige, income, or the like. Let go of your need to define your identity in this world; open your hands to His perfect will, and it will be done. Incredibly, it will all come together- undone to perfectly done. Not perfect, but perfectly done.
Here's what we've done this week...
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| This is the 2nd time we've had to redo Roman's mullet -do. That party in the back grows way too fast. |
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| I love my kitchen helpers, and I pray I'm making them helpers for their wives one day too! |
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| I'm always a little creeped out by this giant bunny, but at least we didn't have tears this year. |
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| Older brother tips on the neighborhood Easter egg hunt. |
effectively understand and interpret different forms of t
exts is essential in our culture today.
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