Coffee CubBuster

Well as they say, be careful what you wish for... shortly after the last post, things have seem to unravel here at the Smith house, and as I hope things weren't too "normal," that wish was granted. It has felt eerily like we are living back three months ago. Not only has it been unseasonably hot (which makes my autumn heart melt), but Levi is now throwing up most of his meals throughout the day. Both my boys contacted the usual fall head cold. The difference between the two of them ten days into the cold is that Silas coughs normally to clear his throat, while the extra mucus that makes Levi coughs triggers his gag reflex. Some of this is completely mental as we seek to distract him by all means necessary. However, nine times out of ten, the battle is lost because he has learned that throwing up will solve any blockage issue. Unfortunately, as we've seen before, now Levi doesn't want to eat as much, and he seems to have much less energy than normal. My mommy heart...

It only seems natural to hope for seasons and circumstances that are relatively normal and problem-free. However, I'm learning that I'd rather have larger, rarer difficulties in my life than constant normalcy. Don't get me wrong, I'm not requesting a life of exhaustion that could be written into a major motion picture.  I think God gives us all times of respite for recovery after a storm. Because we live in a fallen world, hardships are simply part of life. Every single person will face problems, big and small, and if you live long enough, trying to avoid all things negative or difficult is an impossibility. Although, when problems arrive in the form of a familiar package, like minor health blimps on the radar, financial strains on the bank account, uncertain future employment, or relationship tensions, I begin to feel more stress, anxiety, and frustration than if a problem suddenly appears without notice or warning in an oversized, abnormal box. Yes there are similar e...

I heard a radio contest last weekend for any woman who went into labor on Labor Day. I can tell you, from personal experience, the money they were giving out would not have covered the NICU bill that I would have received had I actually gone into labor. We did have a little scare with baby boy 3 last week though, but thankfully it's just the pains of carrying a third child in half a uterus. :) I've practically given up any physical labor on my own part in hopes of cooking this cookie for at least two more months, but when you have a little one that can't walk yet, it makes resting nearly impossible. At least voluntarily giving up laboring has kept me off of bed rest and enjoying every possible second with our family of four while it lasts. When I feel those aches and pains, I praise God that I can have another baby. What a gift the past couple of weeks have been for us!  Bring it on third trimester! These boys make me tough- bring it! I love how much my boys love music...

Sometimes the longer you wait for something, the better it seems. Levi finally waved! After an accidental drawer close on his hand, the light bulb triggered this newfound skill. I think Levi might be naturally right-handed, which has ultimately delayed his left hand (strong hand) from catching on to in developmental milestones. Either way, I don't think I've ever been so excited! I think even Baby boy 3 was doing some clapping for his big brother in the womb! Some other family fun this week when we don't have as many doc appointments... Check me out on my brother's bike ladies! Oh man..... this big bro won't ever leave me alone! He's ruining my cool. Since our bath paint isn't exactly edible, Levi loved the yogurt/whipped cream bath! And Silas did too of course! ~Coffee CubBuster

I read a great quote from an author, speaker, mom whom I've come to appreciate. She recently said, "Forget the numbers in your work. Focus on the net value of  your work. The internet age may try to sell you something different, but don’t ever forget that viral is closely associated with sickness — and focusing on numbers can make you nauseated" (Ann Voskamp, www.aholyexperiencecom). Now my accountant, who also happens to be the father of my children, might think it's impossible to "forget the numbers" in his work. And I don't currently work with a lot of numbers in my job description, yet when you back away from the literal and view the deeper message, this quote is universally applicable. During a time when we can record and publicize everything, it's hard to believe that we shouldn't be constantly in the loop on whatever news has just gone "viral" creating in us a virus for constant connectivity. The garden that we started...

It is very true that absence makes the heart grow fonder. As I approach the one year "anniversary" of my best friend's death (and I use the term anniversary loosely because I don't think it's something to really celebrate), I cannot help but think deeply and fondly of Kyra. I cannot believe a year has already passed. That seems impossible. Yet, as time passes, people often forget about the negative things and focus all their memories on things they love. (Hence, woman having more than one child.) Kyra's death seems a tad bit less surreal a year later, and more realistic. It makes more sense because she always belonged in Heaven, but that doesn't take away the aching I feel to hear her voice, see her face, or grasp her sweet, simple wisdom. Even though I believe she is living out what we all truly desire, unity with God, I selfishly want her to wait and experience that with me. We were all designed to be relational. No matter your aversion to crowds, recl...

People who don't see Levi every week are constantly reminding me how "great" he looks. I agree- even with that mint fudge on his face! It's easy to forget how far he's come though, until I look back at this blog and see how quickly he's changed. As much as people tend to hate forced changed, I think humans are remarkable creatures of adaptability. As quickly as I adjusted to feeding Levi through a tube, I just as quickly adjusted to not using it at all! Yes, he went 10 days without using that G tube once! But similar to those old testament humans who were given bread from heaven and water from rocks, we quickly forget God's goodness the second something isn't ideal and start complaining about our circumstances. In three weeks, Levi lost 9 ounces and is back down to 16 pounds 14 ounces. Thus, before we get a serious scolding and backtrack from our GI doc, the nutritionist wants to double his formula intake. We were syringing (because he can't dri...