Waiting for prayer

We had more sweet people say they were praying for Roman's endoscopy/colonoscopy than I would have imagined. As a standard procedure that wasn't even in a hospital, I wouldn't have predicted such protection partners. Yet, the prep work the day before proved harder and less hopeful than prayer should inspired. It wasn't just watching Roman become more and more lethargic as he refused to follow instructions and risked dehydration. It wasn't the frustration I felt as the doctor told us to discontinue the process and possibly forgo the following day's procedure. No, it was more than that. We felt it from every angle with every relationship under our roof at odds and ends. So what happens when prayers feel empty? When you hear of prayers, but you feel none? Does this mean prayer is pointless, or people are passive? Neither.
Our true root-test comes in the wandering. When the Israelites had seen miracle after miraculous preservation only to find themselves wandering in the desert, they began to doubt God's goodness. Why save us to watch us slowly die? But as Psalm 106 explains, "They soon forgot what He had done and did NOT WAIT for His plan to unfold" (verse 13, NIV). We (even more so in our instantaneous Alexa, Siri, Prime culture) don't know how to ask and then WAIT to receive. To endure the cold, hard, seemingly pointless pain produces a true faith. Faith that proves genuine, not faith that only loves when times are good. True love loves at all times. Thus, true faith doesn't "scorch from the sun" because of lack of root. Rather, it can withstand heat or hardship and accept the good with the bad because the roots are deep and sturdy. These roots have been tested and weathered to improve their strength and grip in the ground. Shallow faith with shallow roots only pushes people further away from truth. I have never met anyone who didn't want to be loved deeply. Neither does our loving Creator. He wants our love to be genuine. We must be tested on occasion to see whether our love is rooted in gifts or in grace.
There are plenty of times when I have truly felt the power of prayer. Then there are "yesterdays" where it feels absent. Yet, I wonder how much worse it would have felt had those prayers not been said. We can't give up when things are hard, nor would we want others to stop loving us when we are hard to love.  God's goodness, thank goodness, does not depend on our faithfulness. It may take years, or a lifetime, but I pray I can WAIT to see His perfect plan unfold in the unknown. As we enter a season of Advent waiting, and as we wait for Roman's biopsy results, may we love all the same and even more.

He may have swallowed a popcorn seed or two because that's all they found in his belly during the procedure! ;P

Turns out mama made this whole bowl, but Ro doesn't like JELLO! 

He's turning out to be one of the toughest kids in the house. A steady, calm rock for us all (also a little stubborn as a rock!).

Strange how quickly they let you leave after the procedure. Buddy fell right back asleep.

But a date with mommy and real food later made all our hearts happy!

This little man is making everyone smile. If he has food, he'll sit and watch the world. 

Literally. If only I could hear his thoughts. 

But he's growing up too fast. Tackling big brothers and all. 

He's my first climber too. 

I spy a fourth boy who wants to sit at the big boy table. We need more chairs!

All that Roman time meant date days were in order. Mama- Si date at the library with competition and treats of course. 

Levi- daddy date with cards, cribbage and a little PGA fun. 

We are so thankful to learn there's no blockage, foreign object, or disease inside our Ro-man. We will learn later this week if there are any major allergies causing his tummy trauma. If all is clear, we will keep waiting for the good-eating days, and pray for wisdom to trust in the wandering ones.

- Waiting Buster