Many adults still do not know the difference between a need and a want. If we sat down and really looked at the venn diagram, I'm sure we could all agree on the vastly different categories included in the two groups, but in a quick verbal match, we blurt out fallacies like children. I am consistently explaining this discrepancy to my oldest son.
I believe strongly in knowing your people. For instance, Silas is a strong-willed first born that needs to be pushed or he will push back. I know this about him, so we let him endure things we wouldn't for little Levi who doesn't push too hard. I am fighting for their hearts right now when the stacks are low so that (Lord willing) it's not as difficult during adolescence. This means we let Silas scream and cry at the top of his lungs for hours sometimes regarding his NEED for things like water, food, or love. Now most people would be ready to call DEFAX on us because these (my smart, sly son has learned) are all considered actual "needs," yet he manipulatively has chosen to request these items when he's being punished or in a particularly foul mood. Thus, we need to show him Who's the Boss (pun intended). We have reassured Si-man that he will always get what he actually "needs," but he will not always get what he wants. A lesson we could all stand to relearn. That means sometimes he'll like his food, clothes, and activities and other times he will not, but the sooner he realizes how to trust and obey joyfully, the sooner his life will feel less like a punishment and more like a gift. Don't read your own story into this though, Silas is a beautiful first-born, but we all have our moments, and despite the beauty of our fall pictures, we all had our moments where we weren't receiving what we wanted, but we always got what we needed, so to me, this fall adventure to New England was a HUGE success. I just miss the gorgeous colors. I NEED more fall here in the south! My soul's nourishment depends on it! (Not sure where Silas gets a flare for the dramatic, but I'm looking into it.)
Happy Fall Y'all!
~Need Buster
I believe strongly in knowing your people. For instance, Silas is a strong-willed first born that needs to be pushed or he will push back. I know this about him, so we let him endure things we wouldn't for little Levi who doesn't push too hard. I am fighting for their hearts right now when the stacks are low so that (Lord willing) it's not as difficult during adolescence. This means we let Silas scream and cry at the top of his lungs for hours sometimes regarding his NEED for things like water, food, or love. Now most people would be ready to call DEFAX on us because these (my smart, sly son has learned) are all considered actual "needs," yet he manipulatively has chosen to request these items when he's being punished or in a particularly foul mood. Thus, we need to show him Who's the Boss (pun intended). We have reassured Si-man that he will always get what he actually "needs," but he will not always get what he wants. A lesson we could all stand to relearn. That means sometimes he'll like his food, clothes, and activities and other times he will not, but the sooner he realizes how to trust and obey joyfully, the sooner his life will feel less like a punishment and more like a gift. Don't read your own story into this though, Silas is a beautiful first-born, but we all have our moments, and despite the beauty of our fall pictures, we all had our moments where we weren't receiving what we wanted, but we always got what we needed, so to me, this fall adventure to New England was a HUGE success. I just miss the gorgeous colors. I NEED more fall here in the south! My soul's nourishment depends on it! (Not sure where Silas gets a flare for the dramatic, but I'm looking into it.)
Happy Fall Y'all!
~Need Buster
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